Apologies firstly for the lateness of this - it should have
gone out on Tuesday but I'm afraid this week's been rather
topsy turvy - and secondly for its brevity, but I'm flying
about like a mad thing at the moment trying to get a hundred
and one things done.
A few mornings ago as I walked home after dropping my youngest
daughter at school, I passed a friend walking the other way
as she headed into school to drop off her eldest 2 kids.
She had the family dog with her, a young, exuberant and
unbelievably bouncy terrier. And, as usual, she was running
late and looking very harassed.
The youngest of her 3 children is three. If you've been there,
done that you'll remember what hard work it is having young
children. They take much longer to do everything than you expect
and if you've got older kids as well they're racing ahead while
the youngster's dragging behind and struggling to keep up.
And the poor old parent is left stuck in the middle trying to
coax the little one on whilst simultaneously trying to watch
where the older ones have got to.
Add to this mix a very boisterous dog on a lead that wants to
race ahead with the older kids and you can imagine that poor old
Mum's having her patience tested.
Just as I walked by it all happened at once; another mother with
young kids walking to school joined my friend from an adjoining
sidestreet just at the moment my friend's youngest child fell over.
Mum bent down to pick her up and the youngest child of Mum number
2 came over to see if her howling friend was ok. Terrier sees
young child of Mum number 2 right beside her and starts jumping
up at her. (And because the child is so small the dog's jumping
right up to face level.)
My friend, as she's in the process of dusting down her daughter
with one hand, obviously feels the other hand being jerked about
by the jumping dog on the end of the lead. She looks up and tells
the dog to stop, while continuing to try and calm down her child.
The dog takes no notice and keeps jumping up as my friend continues
to concentrate on her daughter.
Young child of Mum number 2 backs away from the dog which immediately
stops trying to jump at something now out of reach. My friend has now
sorted out her fallen child, straightens up and sets off again in the
direction of school.
All of this took far longer for me to write about then it did to
happen in real life; the whole incident was all over in less than 10
seconds.
There's no easy solution to this sort of problem. Obviously any
normal parent is going to put the needs of their child above the
training of their dog. But if you can't concentrate on the dog
it's completely pointless giving it a command when you can't even
see if it obeys you never mind do something to enforce it if it doesn't.
That simply reinforces in the dog's mind that it can completely
disregard what you tell it. If you find yourself in this situation
you're better to say nothing at all to the dog, but instead
perhaps ask the other mother if she'd mind taking her child a few
paces back so it's out of reach of the dog.
Once the drama of the fallen child is dealt with it would then be
possible to apologise to the other mother for the dog's behaviour
and explain that you're still in the process of training it. Maybe
you could even enlist her help and, at a mutually convenient time,
(ie NOT when you're all flustered because you're running late for
school) get her to approach you and your dog with her little one.
That way you can engineer the dog wanting to jump up at a time when
you can be concentrating solely on the dog and not be distracted by
other things.
I understand only too well the pressures of modern life with a young
family, and I know we all of us often have to make compromises.
Almost without exception there's something about young children
that young dogs find irresistable. Putting the two together and
expecting to be able to train the dog in that environment is
unrealistic - you're making things much too difficult for yourself.
When it comes to training the dog you need to be able to set aside
some time when you're relaxed and can just concentrate on the job
at hand. I know mothers are supposed to be paragons of multi-tasking
but trying to train the dog at the same time as dealing with a howling
child is stretching it for all but the most talented of multi-taskers!
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